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1. How can I order from you?
Ye can't. Pirate Pizza doesn't make the pizza. We just deliver it. So there ain't nothin' te order from us. Ye just place an order from another pizza delivery place. Then Pirate Pizza's pirates intercept their car, keelhaul the delivery person, and finish the delivery.
2. How much does this cost me?
How much ye got? What say we shows up, and we just takes what we want? Yer wife looks kinda pretty, for starters.
3. So how exactly do I know whether or not you'll show up?
Ye don't.
4. Let me put that a different way. How can I keep you away from my house?
Arrrr. Ye can't! Excepts if ye don't order no pizza. But ye better!
5. What if I order burgers, like from Ninja Burger?
Arrrr! Don't get us started on ninja. Only pizza. Order now. Pirates are standing by. Order or we will kill yer mother. Arrrr. And such.
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